The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
In the early stages of a relationship we enter into a honeymoon phase, a period of time when everything is happy-go-lucky. Time spent with your special person is filled with laughs and intimacy, but the honeymoon phase is exactly that: a phase.
Once this honeymoon phase of the relationship is over, how do we stay in love with our partner? The answer is simple: respark the passion. The most common reasons relationships fail are lack of trust, poor communication, and a difference in priorities.
Here are five important conversations to have to get to know your partner, encourage open communication, and inspire romance.
1. Sex and intimacy
Sex can be a very uncomfortable subject, especially when it comes to protection and health, but having this conversation with your partner is the foundation for a better sex life and an overall healthier relationship. Open communication will increase intimacy, bringing you closer emotionally and making physical touch more pleasurable.
Some key points to discuss include:
- How you and your partner each prefer to start intimacy
- Openness to experimentation
- How often you and your partner prefer to have intimacy
- Preferred form of protection
2. Work and Money
Couples who do not discuss money and budgeting tend to place themselves at a greater risk for failure. Money is a very sensitive topic and can lead to many conflicts if you and your partner are not financially compatible.
Here are a few tips to help you and your partner get started on this conversation:
- Go on a shopping trip together to learn about what your partner values and how they make buying decisions
- Share bank statements and other financial documents
- Discuss how your parents handle money
- Discuss career and educational goals
The family discussion can include both the families you each grew up with as well as expectations for building a family as a couple. Discussing each other’s backgrounds can help develop a lot of trust in one another and can bring a deep understanding as to why we behave the way we do within our relationships. Our upbringing has a significant influence on the standards we have and the concept we have of what our family should look like.
Here are tips on beginning this discussion:
- Ask what age they would like to be married/start considering marriage
- Ask how many kids they would like to have and what age they would like to begin having children
- Ask what their childhood was like
Our spirituality has a significant effect on marital intimacy and our own well-being. Spiritual intimacy does not necessarily mean that you must share beliefs with your partner, it is more about revealing your spirituality and showing support for one another. In a relationship, it is important to have spiritual intimacy with your partner to help understand their beliefs, values, and perception of life.
Here are some tips on helping spiritual intimacy:
- Discuss blessings and inspiration that you witnessed
- Identify the primary intention of the relationship
- Design a spiritual practice with a routine
- Create time for regular intimacy
Knowing your partner’s aspirations and goals allows you to be aware of their wants, needs, desires, and values, as well as understand them on a deeper and more intimate level. This is also a good way to ensure you and your partner are on the same page and headed in a healthy direction.
Here are some tips on learning your partner’s aspirations:
- Develop and share daily goals with one another
- Listen to their interests, including work and hobbies
- Be sensitive towards your partner’s concerns
- Recall positive experiences together