The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at MUJ chapter.
How many of us girls have related to having a phase of absolutely hating everything girly ESPECIALLY pink, for presumably no reason at all?
Shall we start with a little storytime? Once upon a time, in a land far, far away… a mother tried to make her little daughter wear a frock. She cried and cried; she simply wouldn’t wear it.
“Who are you to assign gender to children? And who are you to assign gender to clothes?” the child would wonder at some point.
The gods of gender and expression approved, roaring in the heavens above. Fairies squealed in unison, flinging themselves from rainbow swings, while bards composed and sang exquisitely unique ballads at the top of their lungs.
But the mother simply shook her head, her heteronormativity unbeknownst to the vibrant skies and celebrations. The daughter didn’t know how to make her mom understand queer joy.
That daughter was me.
The celestial beings held their breath. There was still a long way to go, but their divinity remained ready to offer the same love—always.
Growing up, my relationship with gender was… well, tricky, to say the least. Being sapphic only added more spice and bewilderment to the mix. I never had the typical girly besties in childhood—partly because I was shy, partly because I wasn’t ‘girly’ enough. The kind where we braid each other’s hair and just bask in each other’s presence as we seek counsel for drama in our lives and laugh at the stuff we do.
Even when it came to toys, I preferred guns and Beyblades—’boy’ charms. Not very ladylike or comely of me. But then I read about tomboy icons like George from Famous Five by Enid Blyton and Jane Eyre from Charlotte Brontë’s classic novel. And that was a game changer. “Well behaved women seldom changed history”, right?
But here comes Gender again, raising an eyebrow and patting me on the back for the first time but also mysteriously, smiling. I raise an eyebrow, back. There’s much more to this game than just one (aka ‘binary’) checkmate. Much more than finally embracing masculinity in women
One trinket Gender tosses my way: the sudden urge to cut my hair short. And that’s when the chaos starts—because now, I want both long and short hair at the same time! I turn around and see Gender laugh
The game had only just begun, after all!
Plot twist? Gender sets the rules until you beat it—the final boss—crown yourself, and create your own rules. Well, I had to find myself first; only then could I find my tribe.
Well, I had to find myself first, only then I could find my tribe, too
And it’s never too late to do either.
So?
First things first
Why did I hate pink?
I guess it was never about the colour itself, it wasn’t that we grew up overnight and cringed at the fancy and magical. Hope is what keeps dreams alive. It’s society that laughed at girls for having them.
How many of us didn’t want to accept the ‘stereotypical’ feminine interests of ours because of fear of being judged and being put in a box with other girls? Oh the canon event “I’m not the other girls”. But what am I if not a beautiful landscape painted by the coolest girls I’ve ever known? If I’m merely mentioned in the same sentence as them now, I’ll be grinning and beaming
Well, then? Blue isn’t just for boys, pink is not just for girls. I wish for the boys, too, that they would be cheered for expressing their blues and exploring their pink. And of course, more colours to discover for everyone
So, this one goes out to all my girls, especially my mother, my greatest and brightest homegirl. Stronger than the strongest
And also to all my boys, my friends, brothers. Kinder than the kindest
And to the ones who neither fit here or there, or maybe a bit somewhat everywhere, those who craft different and bigger spaces, helping us get a wider view of the world!
Queer, in its very literary sense, means “different”. So, in a way, we all are queer because of being different from each other. The more queer we are, the more diversity and opportunities to understand each other and ironically the realization of coming back to the fact that we all are one, collective, in the end
Nature has uncountable combinations of species, of lives that exist beyond, thank the queers for showing just that, helping us see more ways to love and be loved, and being a guide to those who are just beginning to explore it all!
It was never about pink, girlhood teaches to play.
And I’m just a girl
Womanhood is here to stay, and to rock the world!
It’s Barbie! <3
“And it’s Ken :)”
And OF COURSE, honorary mention: Allan, THE non binary hero!
So, roll the dice and let the games begin!!!
